Why You SHOULD Believe Survivors
I ran into the man that sexually assaulted me this month. It was a hot day. I had on shorts and a tank top. I thought to myself, “Does he think I’m asking for it now?”
He stared at me from across the room for a while and then finally came up to talk to everyone but me. He was smiling, laughing, and cracking jokes but made sure to not make direct eye contact. So I stood there, not saying a word, letting my eyes glaze over with thoughts until he left. These run-ins aren’t something I would normally reflect on but now, I think it’s important for others to realize the effect that the past month has had on survivors.
If you haven’t been living under a rock, you’ve heard about the Kavanaugh hearings. After being accused of sexually assaulting one of his high school classmates, Dr. Christine Blasey Ford, Kavanaugh was confirmed as the new Supreme Court Justice. As a college-aged woman, sexual assault has become something I’m used to hearing about. According to rainn.org, “About 23.1% of women experience rape or sexual assault through physical force, violence, or incapacitation” as an undergraduate. That statistic doesn’t surprise me at all, but it should. When it comes to Brett Kavanaugh’s confirmation, I feel it’s important to reflect on situation’s we’ve been through and to put ourselves in the shoes of Dr. Blasey Ford.
I watched some of Dr. Blasey Ford’s testimony and I had to stop, I got the rest of my updates from Twitter. As a survivor, all of the feelings I had about something that happened years ago came flooding back to me. I’m different because I didn’t report. At that time, I was young and dumb and blamed myself. I had this feeling that if I came forward no one would believe me. I think this is a feeling every survivor has. You’re positive that your name will get dragged through the mud. So I decided that I just wanted to be rid of the feeling that the experience gave me. I never wanted to think about it again, lock it somewhere deep within me.
That memory laid dormant in my mind for some time. Then I heard about the Kavanaugh hearings.
People need to realize how strong you have to be to come forward as Dr. Blasey Ford did. Some said she waited too long to come forward but the real question is, when is the right time? When something so traumatic happens you’re terrified and you want to disappear, but the remarkable thing about Dr. Blasey Ford is that she stepped up. She saw her abuser gaining power and she overcame whatever was keeping her silent. Seeing all of the support she got from others gave me hope, hope that survivors will start being believed. The hearing didn’t turn out like expected but she spoke her truth. In the future, I hope other survivors see Dr. Christine Blasey Ford’s testimony and it gives them the strength to come forward too.
